The Dreaded Question

May 21, 2025 | by Elberta Bergeron

After leaving her job as a nurse to raise her kids, Elberta returned to nursing full time after they left home. When it came time to retire, she wondered how she would fill her days. Read on to see how God opened Elberta’s eyes to the fresh opportunities of this season of life.

Your husband was first to retire. What did that look like?

When Dick retired, he needed a plan. He wanted days filled with purpose. He had enjoyed dabbling in stocks, so he decided he would delve into finances full time and use it for ministry. When the opportunity came to retire, he grabbed it. After working 34 years at the same company, I wondered if it would be difficult, but Dick has flourished in retirement!

How was your path different?

For me, retirement was an ‘ease-into’. Once Dick retired I wanted more time with him, so my job became an interruption in my life. My nursing license was up for renewal, which would have been expensive. Giving up my license was the hardest part, since I had worked hard to regain it after raising my children. But the timing made sense. I went from full-time to part-time to per diem. When I finally stepped away, it was pretty easy. 

What was life like after you retired?

At first I was okay with retirement life. But I had no plan. I was becoming lazy, settling into comfortable days and reading my books. Then I started to get the dreaded question: “So, what do you do all day?” What did I do all day? Some days were full, others were not. Not knowing how to answer revealed I wasn’t clear on how to use my retirement. So I prayed: “Lord, what do you want me to do with my time?” The question I dreaded became an opportunity for clarity. 

What changes did you make?

I decided to develop intentionality with my time and be more proactive, to look for opportunities to serve instead of letting them come to me. I offered to make a meal for someone who might benefit. I developed new ways to connect with out-of-state grandchildren. I reached out to people going through difficult times, and worked at connecting with unsaved neighbors. 

There were also unexpected needs. Soon after leaving my job, my dad had a medical crisis and needed 24/7 care. Retirement allowed Dick and me to care for him in our home for the last six months of his life. God prepared me to care for my dad, and I am so grateful to have had that time with him.

I am still lazy at times. And then there are times I have a hard time saying no and ignore what my aging body needs. My husband’s wisdom keeps me from overextending. 

How do you think about retirement now?

Retiring in my ‘winter’ years has caused me to consider what I want my legacy to be. My hope is that those who knew me would know that God was my life and my light, that I loved Christ, and that my desire was that they would love him also. One daughter gifted me an opportunity to write my memories in a question-and-answer format. The details of my life, salted with words of gospel life, are recorded in a book for all my family. 

I’ve also found that little things add up. Sending notes and reaching out, even occasionally, fosters relationships that provide opportunities for gospel interactions. It tells people I love them and gives them better ears to hear when I proclaim the truths of the Bible.

Retirement is like a resurrection: death in one area to give life in another. Doors open that were closed before, and the doors of availability and time open wider. What benefits have I seen?

• Increased availability to serve: being with a friend going through chemotherapy; sharing coffee and the gospel with a neighbor; taking time when a friend who needs to talk; volunteering at church
• Increased time to support and serve my husband, especially as we age
• Increased availability to read with an older grandchild and tackle books I have been wanting to read
• Increased flexibility to connect with out-of-state family 
• Increased time to write to those in need of encouragement
• Increased time for God’s Word and prayer

What encouragement do you have for those facing retirement?

There is much gospel life in retirement!

Psalm 92:14-15 says:

“They will still yield fruit in old age;
They shall be full of sap and very green,
To declare that the Lord is upright;
He is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in Him.” (NASB)

It took some stepping back for me to see all that retirement offers and be thankful for that dreaded question. Retirement seems to imply your work is over. May it never be! There is much to be done. It just takes a different turn and requires more from you, as you now dictate your days. But God goes before us and purposes that he be glorified, so ask of him and he will be faithful to lead you. You don’t walk retirement alone. 

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About Elberta Bergeron